Archive for August 2008

Madam Perwinkle’s Melanie Unmasked by Michele Bardsley!

August 17, 2008

My BFF Michele has a new book out and it’s fantastic! I had the privilege of doing the cover art, so yeah me, lol. Go check it out. It’s a lot of naughty, naughty fun! You won’t be disappointed.

Melanie Trident is an accountant for Viva Venus, her step-sister’s über successful day spa. Mel is used to being the plain one, especially when compared to her gorgeous blonde sibling. That’s probably why she keeps reading her favorite romance novel, Wizard’s Heart. At least then she can pretend she’s the heroine of her own story.

Her sis insists she attends a masked ball to celebrate the opening of Club Mirage; Mel reluctantly agrees and hits the shopping district. She discovers an unusual store called Madam Periwinkle’s Erotic Delights. It has every naughty thing a girl needs to entertain herself and a bevy of lovers. Yet, Melanie is drawn to the golden Mask of Aphrodite. The unusual proprietor has it wrapped and boxed before Mel decides she even wants it.

As if that’s not weird enough, she meets a gorgeous stranger in a coffee shop. Nic Chival’s interest in her is both surprising and intriguing, but Melanie doesn’t trust easily. However, she doesn’t count on Madam Periwinkle or the special qualities of her merchandise. The magic of the mask opens up a whole new world… and Melanie has to decide if she wants to risk everything for the heart of a man who already loves her.

OMG – An American Hero – Jason Lezak!!!

August 11, 2008

I am a huge fan of the Olympics. I have been for as long as I can remember. I have been looking forward to them all year long, and I have to say, I have not been disappointed!

I just finished watching the Mens 400 freestyle relay (I’d Tivo’d the Olympics and avoided watching or reading any news) and let me tell you. I thought I was going to have a heart attack! I watched it because of Phelps. He’s an exciting swimmer, going for a record breaking 8 gold medals in this years Summer Olympics. Woot! I stayed in the race for Jason Lezak. The 32 year old swimmer who had the last leg of the race.

People, it seriously looked like all the bragging the French were doing about “smashing” the Americans was not all smoke. The French swimmer Bernard was nearly a full body length ahead of Lezak going into the final 100. At the turn, it wasn’t getting any better.

Then suddenly, the last 50 meters, Lezak incredibly started gaining on Bernard. The announcers were going wild and my heart was thumping in my chest, as the oldest dude on the swimming team became neck in neck with the old World Record holder.

Lezak touched the finish an eighth one-hundredths of a second AHEAD of Bernard for a history making split time of 46.06 seconds. HOLY COW!! I screamed, did a little happy dance, and made my kid watch it again with me. The Americans won Gold, and the French had to settle for Silver. Let me tell you, they looked damn near like they would throw up. Especially with all the smack they’d been talking this week. 🙂

In that moment, Jason Lezak was the sexiest thing I’ve ever seen in or out of the water. Congratulations Team USA, and major kudos to Jason Lezak for a fan-fucking-tastic race!

Renee

40 and Fabulous…

August 9, 2008

Fabulously freaked out, that is!! OMG! I’m FORTY! Ugh.

On this day in 1968 my mother went into labor. She said I was the easiest birth out of all her kids, but the most difficult to raise. Apparently, I just floated out. Sort of as a prequel of bigger and better things to come.

You know, I think I’m aging okay. Other than I’m starting to get farsighted and that’s sort of got me squicked, not too shabby. I think the thing that freaks me out the most is the same thing that freaked me out about 30.  It’s the whole, Oh dear lord, I’ve moved into another decade bracket.

I mean, I’ve gotten pretty used to saying “I’m in my thirties.” And now, I can no longer claim that fame. I’m seriously considering a “mid-life crisis.” But first I have to figure out how much effort and work it will take on my part before I commit to one. LOL. I have a feeling a mid-life crisis would be more trouble than it’s worth.

Any ways, just sharing my pain. So, how was 40 for you? And if you haven’t reached that age yet, what are your feelings about it. I mean, really up until this week, turning 40 was looking pretty inconsequential, then all of a sudden… BAM. It was like the whole thing hit me between the eyes.

Hugs,

Renee

Just playing…

August 4, 2008

This is a piece I did recently after taking an up close picture of my eye. I cut out the iris, so that the eye you see is partially my own (with a little enhancement), though the rest of the face is totally not. LOL. Any ways, thought it turned out cool enough to share.

Hope you enjoy.

Hugs,

Renee

Envy

Envy

I seriously need a twelve-step program…

August 1, 2008

Yesterday at 1:30 pm, my Internet stopped working. I was cool. I was handling it. I was thinking, any second now, it will start working. So, at 4:30 pm when it still wasn’t working, and I started getting a little shaky, I called the cable company to find out what the heck was going on.

First, the number I called was one of those 888 numbers. I was rerouted through India, I’m pretty sure, and after being on hold for 40 freaking minutes, the nice woman with the accent said: “There is an outage in your area. You Internet should be up in 2-3 hours.”

Now, keep in mind, I’d already been without the Internet for 4 hours at this time. But I thought, okay, another 2-3 hours, I can handle it.

So, at 7:00 pm, still no Internet. The flop sweat is starting to kick in, my palms are clammy, and my heart is starting to thump a little fast. I call the 888 number again. I get a stupid automated message that says “We are aware of an outage in your area. Technicians have been dispatched to resolve the problem.”

I’m like “F*CK!” 8:00 pm, same thing, 9:00 pm, again, nothing’s changed. I swear at this point I was starting to shake. But at least I had “So You Think You Can Dance” and “Last Comic Standing” to occupy my time.

10:00 pm, I’m thinking that if I hear that freaking woman on that automated message one more time I’m going to stab someone. I try at this point to bootleg some unsecured network. Doesn’t work. (See, the stealing, or attempted theft, has already begun – I can totally see why junkies steal from family and friends at this point).

11:00 pm, I’m getting paranoid. The Internet company is somehow denying me access on purpose! I just know it.

By Midnight, it’s just getting ridiculous. I hear a noise in the kitchen. Somethings scratching at the window. Etc… My son kept teasing me, saying, “hey, I think the Internet’s back.” Then when I’d check, he’d laugh. I was ready to pack him off to an orphanage.

At 4:00 am I’m starting to feel the first signs of hallucinations in combination with all the other withdrawal symptoms, and I’m ready to jack the cable right into a vein if it will get me the Internet, I went to bed.

So, I wake up this morning at 10:00 am. Yes, TEN A M. I know, stupidly early for me. The Internet is back up and running. When my email starts downloading, you can’t even imagine the sense of relief flooding through my body. Hell, I didn’t even get coffee or a cigarette for nearly 20 minutes while I just cruised the world wide web. I didn’t even pee. I just let that unholy fix flood my system and return my synapsis back to status quo. (Thankfully, I won’t have to remove all the sharp objects from my bathroom and lock myself in — which is where, I think we all know, this was heading.)

I’m sick. I need help. I realize that now. LMAO. I tried looking up a 12 Step program for Internet junkies, but nothing’s listed online. *grin*

Renee